Sorry, My Babysitter is Out of the Country, Washing Her Hair

Since we have friends that all have kids around the same age, I feel like we are constantly being asked for a babysitter recommendations.  And it just so happens that in the past couple of years we’ve lucked into a pretty fabulous sitter.

But give out her information?  I think not.

Now, it’s not because she’s a bad sitter.  That’s far from true – she’s the best.  And it’s not that I don’t want her to make more money – everyone has bills to pay.  And while sitter/nanny poaching is a real thing – I’m not even afraid of another family taking her.  You see, when it comes right down to it, my requirements for a sitter are very minimal.  Actually, there are only three things I need from a sitter:  (1) show up on time…or close to it, (2) actually interact and play with my children, and (3) the house must be standing when I get home.

That’s it.  Nothing more.

I don’t need her to cook.  I don’t need her to clean.  I don’t need her to drive my kids around.  All of which seem to be requirements of sitters lately.  Oh, and it would be helpful if they could be fluent (and able to teach) 8 languages and experts on green living.  Composting, anyone?

Of course, I don’t blame people for wanting these things in a sitter.  I just don’t require them, and I’d be a bit nervous to put my sitter out there like that.

And as perfect as she may be for our family, our sitter is far from perfect.  If you’re a neat freak, our sitter isn’t for you.  I can’t tell you how many times I’ve come home to finger paint on my tile floors.  I take it as a sign that she helped my kids with a fun craft, while others may see that as leaving a mess behind.  If you are extremely organized, our sitter isn’t for you.  I can’t tell you how many times I’ve had to go on the hunt for the girls’ cereal bowls the day after she was there (and unloaded the dishwasher), only to find them mixed in with my pots and pans.  If you’re super overprotective about what your kids eat, she’s probably not for you.  Because my kids can always get her to okay an extra packet of fruit snacks.  When it comes to snacks, she’s like grandma, but better.  And lets not even talk about the number of times that she’s put my kids in swim diapers instead of regular diapers because of the “cute fish on them”.  You know, on days they weren’t swimming…

The bottom line is – our sitter isn’t perfect, but she’s a perfect fit for our family.  She’s reliable and helpful and kind and teaches my kids Spanish when they aren’t outside playing with bubbles (or other things that I don’t like to do).  I happily overpay her because she’s worth it.  For us.

But if I gave out her information and it didn’t work between you?  Well, that would just be awkward.  Or you’d want to tell me why she’s not for you.  Or you’d judge my parenting choices for her being my go-to sitter.  And quite frankly, that’s a judgy-awkwardness that I’d just prefer to go without.  Instead I make up excuses – she’s on vacation, doesn’t travel to your area, or isn’t taking on new families.  Whatever it takes so you are no longer interested in her contact information.

So when I give you a ridiculous excuse as to why I can’t give you my babysitter’s information – like she’s out of the country, washing her hair – at least you know why.  You have higher sitter standards than I do and I just don’t want you to know it.